Never have I

Never have I felt so loved in this world. It’s a different feeling and I fought it off for a long time, afraid of getting attached and because of that I almost lost him. But his love is hard, deep and pure and he has a fight in him more powerful than all my fears.

He knows me better than I probably know myself. His touch is seductive and sensual, strong but soft. His eyes look at me in amazement and you can see his love sparkle. He is driven to make me happy and I have no idea how I got so lucky to have him. 

Part of me is angry at myself for the time I wasted trying to push him away. I focused on all the things wrong, I refused to accept his love. I couldn’t allow myself to believe someone could love me, especially the way he did. So I guarded myself, protected my heart. But deep down my soul ached for him. His touch, his conversation, his strong arms around my waist, his gaze looking at me. The warm feeling I get when he is near me, secure and adored.

From the first message I felt like I had known him forever. I opened up to him like no one before. As scared as I was of the fall, I couldn’t walk away from him. I couldn’t imagine not having him to make me laugh, or feel his touch. The connection was so strong, it felt like a drug and I needed more. But my fear of losing myself, losing control, that was more powerful. That is until I lost him. Then I crumbled and realized as hard as I tried, as cold as I was, it didn’t work. I still fell for that asshole with every piece of my being. 

Now forever with him doesn’t seem long enough. 

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. fearthyself
    Mar 31, 2017 @ 22:35:58

    This is one of my favorite posts. Your words are true and that is how I look at you. I am noticing more by every passing moment you are looking at me the way I look at you.

    Reply

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